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CAUTION HEAVY :

When there is a catastrophic event... It changes lives. Sometimes, loved ones are lost and forever, lives are marred by the events of that day. For a lifetime, every year the day will come and people will recall their loss and their lives before the event. 

Imagine if that event didn't occur in just one single day. Perhaps it consisted of cumulative events leading to the same result. The result is still catastrophic. There is still loss. There is still the marred life and recollection of your life before the event.

Imagine if you're the only person who acknowledged the event at all. Everyone else that is aware of this event taking place acts as though its never occurred. They have all gone on with life as though it never happened. Their lives are not marred by it in the least. And so... You figure that the only way to move forward is to go with the flow, and act as if. 

Suppose you, at one time were satisfied with life as you know it now; after the event.  But years later, after you've grown, you find yourself in a place where you feel the need for the event to be at the very least acknowledged. Because what you lost can only be measured on a massive scale. You lost not only time and bits of yourself, but family and connections you will never know. And in turn, your children will never know. You feel as though your kids miss out, or better that you cannot give this to them.

How do you handle it? What do you do now? 

Im at a strange place right now. A place I thought I dealt with and put behind me. But since I had my daughter, this has been an issue for me in increasing frequency. 

So, today I started my journey. I am trying to find my way through a dense forest that I have never traveled before. 

FUN FUN FUN… And a sore back:

Ugh... On a much less serious note!!!!

 I went sledding,for the first time ever, yesterday with my daughter. I only went down the slope 3 or 4 times. But the climbing and the impact were a beating to my body.  With recent knee and back surgeries I was really risking it. But I felt like, ya know I have always wanted to do it. And never have been able. 

I watched her out there alone for a bit and then put on my gloves and sweatshirt. Of course I wasn't nearly prepared for the full body soaking that I would get. So I came in pretty cold 2 hours later! 

We have a good 10 ft tall 15 foot wide mountain of snow in front of the house. We dug out a tunnel that lead to an igloo sort of thing that we sat inside of. And then slid down the hill a few times. Before I knew it, it was time to go in and figure out dinner for the family. 

My day ended with another migraine, and that sucked!  But I slept like a rock.. And my daughter has talked about nothing else since! That makes me happy on a level I cant explain.

With so many quotes to choose from that sum it up…. I chose this: 

Every now and then, bite off more than you can chew        ~Kobi Yamada

Happy Friday Everyone!